Sunday, 17 April 2016

2016 songs in 5 words or less

(Las canciones de 2016 en 5 palabras inglesas o menos)

My Ranking of the 2016 songs:
(in April, after the official album release and before the rehearsals, compiled with the help of Mr. Gerbear’s Eurovision 2016 Sorting Tool)

12 points: FRANCE (Amir "J'ai cherché"): Mais oui! Oh la la!

10 points: SERBIA (Sanja Vučić ZAA "Goodbye (Shelter)"): I'm infatuated with melodramatic Sanja!

8 points: MACEDONIA (Kaliopi "Dona" (Дона)): Vintage gem by outstanding performer

7 points: UKRAINE (Jamala "1944"): Haunting, moving, meaningful and unique

6 points: ITALY (Francesca Michielin "No Degree of Separation"): Moving classic ballad

5 points: GEORGIA (Nika Kocharov & Young Georgian Lolitaz "Midnight Gold"): Accomplished rock number kicking ass

4 points: ESTONIA (Jüri Pootsmann "Play"): Classy retro coolness

3 points: LITHUANIA (Donny Montell "I've Been Waiting for This Night"): Powerful song with talented singer

2 points: SPAIN (Barei "Say Yay!"): Surprisingly contemporary and "urban". Fun.

1 point: FINLAND (Sandhja "Sing It Away"): Horse Meat Disco time!

And then:

 BOSNIA AND HERZEGOVINA (Dalal & Deen feat. Ana Rucner and Jala "Ljubav je"): A very passionate Balkan chorus

 ALBANIA (Eneda Tarifa "Fairytale"): Bjork-esque underrated loveliness

 GERMANY (Jamie-Lee "Ghost"): Catchy and boring simultaneously. Puzzling.

 MONTENEGRO (Highway "The Real Thing"): I don't always love it

 ICELAND (Greta Salóme "Hear Them Calling"): Desperate copycat of past winners

 AUSTRALIA (Dami Im "Sound of Silence"): Stylish, well produced ethereal product

 UNITED KINGDOM (Joe & Jake "You're Not Alone"): Harmless anthem with pretty boys

 ARMENIA (Iveta Mukuchyan "LoveWave"): WTF WTF WTF WTF WTF

 CZECH REPUBLIC (Gabriela Gunčíková "I Stand"): Pretty but not meaty

 DENMARK (Lighthouse X "Soldiers of Love"): Boys are prettier than song

 IRELAND (Nicky Byrne "Sunlight"): Meh

 ISRAEL (Hovi Star "Made of Stars"): Forgettable. Earlier version was superior.

 HUNGARY (Freddie "Pioneer"): Handsome man with derivative song

 NORWAY (Agnete "Icebreaker"): Vulgar but strangely addictive

 RUSSIA (Sergey Lazarev "You Are the Only One"): Eurovision by numbers with muscle

 SAN MARINO (Serhat "I Didn't Know"): Every year there's a joker

 GREECE (Argo "Utopian Land"): Politically correct pseudo-ethnic mess

 CROATIA (Nina Kraljić "Lighthouse"): Boring irritating pseudo-Celtic number

 BULGARIA (Poli Genova "If Love Was a Crime"): Uninspiring novelty foolery

 POLAND (Michał Szpak "Color of Your Life"): Old fashioned but strangely compelling

 BELARUS (Ivan "Help You Fly"): Will he finally get naked?

 SLOVENIA (ManuElla "Blue and Red"): Decent chorus but unremarkable

 SWEDEN (Frans "If I Were Sorry"): He should be sorry indeed

 LATVIA (Justs "Heartbeat"): I don't get this one

AZERBAIJAN (Samra "Miracle"): Pretty singer, so so song

 NETHERLANDS (Douwe Bob "Slow Down"): Representing the USA yet again

 ROMANIA (Ovidiu Anton "Moment of Silence"): Potential which hasn't been fulfilled

 MALTA (Ira Losco "Walk on Water"): An assault on good taste

 CYPRUS (Minus One "Alter Ego"): Rock schlager meets Britney. Horror.

 MOLDOVA (Lidia Isac "Falling Stars"): How does this go again?

 BELGIUM (Laura Tesoro "What's the Pressure"): Uplifting yet it annoys me

 SWITZERLAND (Rykka "The Last of Our Kind"): Excruciatingly irritating chorus; pain!

 AUSTRIA (Zoë "Loin d'ici"): Can only hear with earplugs

Sunday, 24 January 2016

My ranking of the 2016 ESC songs as they are announced:

(My top eurovisivo de las canciones de 2016 según se van anunciando)

It will change soon!  -   ¡Cambiará pronto!
  1. France
  2. Serbia
  3. Israel 
  4. Macedonia
  5. Georgia
  6. Italy
  7. Ukraine
  8. Lithuania 
  9. Bosnia-Herzegovina
  10. Albania
  11. Spain
  12. Finland
  13. Estonia 
  14. Germany
  15. UK
  16. Hungary
  17. Russia 
  18. Ireland
  19. Denmark 
  20. Croatia
  21. Montenegro 
  22. Australia
  23. Norway
  24. Iceland
  25. Latvia/Letonia
  26. Armenia
  27. Czech Republic
  28. Azerbaijan 
  29. Netherlands
  30. Belgium
  31. Slovenia
  32. Greece
  33. Sweden
  34. Cyprus
  35. Poland
  36. Malta
  37. San Marino
  38. Belarus
  39. Romania
  40. Austria
  41. Switzerland
  42. Moldova